In 1992, John Gray, Ph.D., came up with a remarkable publication called “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus”. This book was meant to be a practical guide for improving communication and getting what you want in your relationships.
He felt the need to write this book when USA was hit by a storm of divorces, which continued to spiral upwards. He also underwent a personal painful relationship, until he remarried and found wisdom with his spouse on his cumbersome marital journey. Following are some root causes and suggested strategies for both genders to understand and overcome the communication deadlock that may result in failed relationships.
How men can listen without getting angry
For women, communication is of the highest importance. The number one way a man can succeed in fulfilling a woman’s primary love need is through communication. Remember, she seeks from a man: care, understanding, respect, devotion, validation, and reassurance. Every man should engrave this on his heart for a loving relationship.
Relationships become easier when we understand our partner’s primary needs. Without giving more but by giving what is required we do not burn out. Love often fails, because people instinctively give what they want. Remember a woman does not want what you do. She is different just as you are, but this difference can be celebrated and bridged with patience and understanding.
The most wonderful gift that a man can give to a woman is genuinely listening to what she has to say without showing anger and feeling frustrated.
When she expresses herself, she feels understood. In return, she is able to give him what he seeks from her:
- loving trust
Exceptions will always exist. However, following is a brief chart for men to understand the gender differences. These are some suggestions for men to handle difficult situations, when women may feel threatened.
This is an excerpt from the print issue.
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