Assalamu Alaiykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu,
O Slaves of Allah (swt), look around you; look at the amazing creation of Allah (swt) around you; look at the laws that Allah (swt) governs His creation with. As human beings, you and I, we need food and drink to survive, we need air to breathe, and we need a proper shelter to protect ourselves. Likewise, as human beings, we need relationships in the form of family and friends to survive. We are not a creation that was created to live in solitude. As our Maker rightfully states in the Noble Quran,
“O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the most honourable of you with Allah is that (believer) who has At-Taqwa (i.e. one of the Muttaqun) Verily, Allah is All-Knowing, All-Aware.” (Al Hujurat 49:13)
Our Powerful and Beloved Maker also states in the Noble Quran,
“And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect.” (Ar-Rum 30:21)
My dear brothers and sisters in Islam, just pause for a moment to reflect. Our Powerful Maker, if He had willed, He could have created us with no need at all towards a mate or a spouse. He could have created us like certain unicellular organisms, and made us to reproduce by ourselves without the need for a mate or a partner. But, on the other hand, out of His infinite power and wisdom, He created us in pairs. As He states,
“And of everything We have created pairs, that you may remember (the Grace of Allah).) (Adh-Dhariyat 51:49)
From this, we understand that marriage is one of Allah’s (swt) laws; one of the laws of Allah (swt), as well as, a great and beautiful Sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (sa). So, for today’s episode, as I am sure, most of you must have already guessed, it is going to be about the beautiful Sunnah of Nikkah; the beautiful Sunnah of marriage. The blessed bond of marriage is something that holds a position of perpetual significance- because of the pivotal role it plays in a human being’s life. Therefore, the pure teachings of Islam encourage marriage and discourages monasticism. In one narration, the Prophet (sa) is reported to have said:
“Monasticism has not been enjoined upon us, Do you not have a role model, a beautiful role model in me?” The narration goes along the lines of these words… “By Allah (swt)- verily I fear Allah (swt), and I stay away from His boundaries more than any of you.” (Bukhari)
Look at the words of Prophet (sa). The Prophet (sa), is also reported to have said (and the narration has been recorded in the book of Imam Bukhari (ra) and Imam Muslim (ra):
The narration goes along the lines of these words:
“Indeed, I swear by Allah (swt), I fear Allah (swt), and I am conscious of Allah (swt) better than any of you; yet, I fast some days and break my fast on others. I pray part of the night and sleep part of the night, and I marry women. So, anyone who dislikes my Sunnah is not a follower of me.” (Bukhari, Muslim)
And, we are all familiar with the famous narration of the Prophet (sa) where he addresses youth, and this narration is recorded in Bukhari and Muslim.
“O youth, those among you who can afford marriage, should do so, for it lowers the gaze and guards the private parts from fornication. And those who cannot afford it, should fast, for fasting is like a shield (i.e. it suppresses the desire of an individual, and protects him from that which is forbidden, that which is Haram).”
Alhumdulillah, now that we have established that marriage is one of the laws of Allah (swt), governing mankind, as well as, a great Sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (sa). It is sure to have many virtues and advantages attached to it. So, let’s discuss a few of them.
- Preservation of one’s faith and Deen
A righteous spouse is considered to be a ticket to paradise- a ticket to Jannah. Righteous spouses help and assist one another in pleasing Allah (swt), obeying Allah (swt) and staying away from that which displeases Allah (swt). The Prophet (sa) is reported to have said:
‘When Allah (swt) grants an individual a righteous wife, He has helped him to preserve or safeguard half of his Deen. Let him then fear and be conscious of Allah (swt), in regard to the other half of his Deen.’ (Tabarani)
- Helps in preservation of one’s chastity and purity
We men, it’s part of our Fitrah, our natural disposition that we have a desire for women, and women have a desire for men; the devil seizes this opportunity to entice us, and seduce us with the opposite gender. But, a married individual has a quick means of protection to protect himself from the seductions, and the snares of the devil. For after all, what on earth can a woman have that his wife does not already have?
- The couple enjoys love, mercy, closeness, intimacy and security
Love and mercy are extremely important sentiments that brighten an individual’s life, and Allah (swt) states in the verse mentioned earlier- that He has placed love and mercy, passion and compassion between the two spouses.
He also states in another place,
“They are Libas (i.e. body cover, or screen), or Sakan (i.e. you enjoy the pleasure of living with her), for you and you are the same for them.” (Al Baqarah 2:187)
There is this wonderful feeling of closeness and intimacy that is savoured, and enjoyed by the married couple.
- The lawful fulfillment of desires
As I stated earlier, that our Maker has instilled in us the desire for the opposite gender, this desire can be fulfilled in unlawful ways which will bring about disastrous effects upon the individuals, as well as, societies at large. But, alternatively from the favours of our Lord is that He provided for us with marriage- a lawful avenue for venting out our desires. Our beautiful religion is the only religion, I think, that considers even the sexual relationship between two spouses a form of Ibadah; a form of worship. Look at this amazing narration where some of the companions of the Prophet (sa) go to him, and complain about the wealthy individuals from them enjoying a better chance at getting more rewards than them. They went and said to him, that they pray and fast like us, but they dish out charity from the surplus of wealth that they have at their disposal. The prophet (sa) asked them, but has not Allah (swt) given you that which you may offer as charity? And, then he taught them something just mind blowing:
Every Tasbeeh, saying Subhan’Allah is a charity.
Every Takbeer, saying Allahu Akbar is a charity.
Every Tehleel, saying La illaha illa Allah is a charity.
Every Tahmeed, saying Alhumdulillah is a charity.
Enjoining good and forbidding evil is charity
Having a sexual relationship with your spouse is also considered a charity.
The Sahabah (rta) (companions) were amazed, they asked the Prophet (sa): “Ya Rasool Allah (sa), even the sexual relationship that an individual enjoys with his spouse is considered a charity? And, the Prophet (sa) went on to clarify that: “Yes! (The narration goes along the lines in these words). For if that individuals were to fulfill his desires in a Haram, in a forbidden manner, of course, he would be sinning. So, if he were to fulfill it in a Halal manner with his spouse, through the beautiful bond of marriage, naturally he has to be rewarded by Allah (swt).”(Bukhari)
My dear brothers and sisters in Islam, with that we conclude today’s episode.
Jazakumullahu Khairan,
WassalaamuAlaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu
Transcribed for hiba