Powerful Dua of a parent

Image Courtesy www.inkoffaith.com

 

 

In the name of Allah (swt), the most Beneficent, the most Merciful

All praises are for Allah (swt), the most Compassionate, the most Forgiving.

Salutations and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad (sa), his family and companions.

Oh Allah (swt), I submit myself to You.

I realize that parenting a child is a very difficult task, and I turn to You in humility for Your help.

I implore You for Your wisdom and guidance.

Oh Allah (swt), I know that our children are an Amanah from You, to care for and to raise in a manner that is pleasing to You.

Help me do that in the best way.

Teach me how to love in a way the You would want me to love.

Help me where I need to be healed, improved, nurtured, and made whole.

Help me walk with righteousness and integrity, so that You may always be pleased with me.

Allow me to be a God-fearing role model with all the communication, teaching, and nurturing skills that I may need.

Oh Allah (swt), You know what our children need. Help and guide us in praying for our children.

Oh Allah (swt), put a hedge of safety around our children. Protect their bodies, minds, and emotions from any kind of evil and harm.

Oh Allah (swt), I pray that You protect them from accidents, diseases, injuries, and any other physical, mental, or emotional afflictions and abuse.

Oh Allah (swt), I pray that You keep our children free from any addictions and vices.

Draw them close to You for protection from every ill and evil influence of our society, whether it’s apparent to us or not.

Oh Allah (swt), grant them the best of company as their friends — people who will inspire them to love and worship and obey You.

Oh Allah (swt), grant our children Hidayah, and a heart that loves to obey You.

Shine Your light on any secret or unseen rebellion in their hearts, and destroy it before it takes root.

Oh Allah (swt), guide them away from any pride, selfishness, jealousy, hypocrisy, malice, and greed and make them uncomfortable with sins.

Penetrate their hearts with Your love and reverence today and always.

Oh Allah (swt), make apparent to them the truth in any situation, and let them not be misled by falsehood.

Oh Allah (swt), grant our children the ability to make clear decisions, and let them always be attracted to good things that are pure, noble, true, and just.

Oh Allah (swt), guide them in making choices that please You.

Oh Allah (swt), help them to taste the sweetness of walking with a humble spirit in obedience and submission to You.

Oh Allah (swt), grant them the wisdom to choose their words carefully, and bless them with a generous and caring spirit.

Oh Allah (swt), I pray that they never stray from the path of Deen, and that You give them a future filled with Your best promises.

Oh Allah (swt), always keep our children cleansed, and pure from evil and Shayateen.

Oh Allah (swt), keep them steadfast in establishing Salah, and help them revere the Glorious Quran as Your Word and Law, and to read it with understanding daily. Let it be their source of light and guidance.

Oh Allah (swt), let our daughters love wearing Hijab, and our sons the dress of a humble Muslim.

Let their dress be a representation of their Iman, and of their love and respect for Your commands.

Lead them to a position where they rely truly on Your power alone, and fear You in the open and in secret.

Oh Allah (swt), make them so strong in their Deen that they never encounter doubt.

Oh Allah (swt), do not allow any negative attitudes in the place of our children’s lives.

Oh Allah (swt), guide our children in honouring and obeying You, Your Rasool (sa), and us as parents (when we are commanding that which is pleasing to You).

Make them the coolness of our eyes.

Oh Allah (swt), fill our children with compassion and caring that will overflow to each member of our family and society.

Oh Allah (swt), grant them piety.

Oh Allah (swt), help them love, value, appreciate, and respect one another with good communication between them always.

Oh Allah (swt), drive out any division between our children and bring them healing.

I pray there be no strain, breach, misunderstanding, arguing, fighting, or severing of ties.

Oh Allah (swt), allow them to one day marry righteous, God-fearing, kind, hard-working, intelligent, beautiful, healthy spouses who get along with each other, and respect and love (and genuinely enjoy) every member of our family and who lead our children (i.e. their spouses) even closer to You and Jannat ul Firdaus.

Oh Allah (swt), please grant me the company of pious friends, relatives, extended community members, and teachers who will be inspirational role models for my children, and will help me raise them to be the best of believers.

Oh Allah (swt), please don’t let me become self-satisfied and arrogant in my parenting, but please don’t humble me or shame me through my children’s misdeeds either. Please let me always give credit for their good character to You, and please don’t ever let me stop praying for them.

Oh Allah (swt), please don’t let my children be “late” in meeting any of life’s milestones that are expected of them.

Oh Allah (swt), protect my children from debt. Make them givers and not takers.

Oh Allah (swt), grant my children noble professions with Halal incomes that give them respect and dignity in Your Eyes, and in the eyes of their fellow human beings.

Oh Allah (swt), grant them worldly comfort and Aafiyah so that my children can come to You through the Door of Gratitude, and so that they are not forced to come to You through the Door of Patience. Please let them always be grateful and patient.

Oh Allah (swt), I pray for a close, loving, happy and fulfilling relationship with them for all the days of our lives, and to be reunited with them in Jannat ul Firdaus. آمِيْن يَارَبَّ الْعَالَمِينْ

 

Expert’s opinion : Are you lucky- Does your family give you tears of joy and merry?

Qurrata Aaiyyun                                                          Image Courtesy www.imgrum.net

 

Ya Allah (swt), give us the undeserved gift! What gift?  – a gift from our wives and our husbands, and our children, give us what makes our eyes so happy that it makes us cry- Qurrata Aaiyyun  it cools our eyes.

Do you know what that means? It makes you so happy that you want to cry.

When you listen to your children recite the Quran, and they love reciting the Quran- it makes you so happy that you want to cry.

When you look at your wife, and how she is raising your children- it makes you so happy that you want to cry. When she looks at her husband, who wakes up her children for Fajr, and takes them to the Masjid- she wants to cry, she is so happy. Our husbands cry and our wives cry; but they don’t cry because they are happy… they cry for other reasons.. We are asking Allah (swt) for tears of joy – we want to be so happy with our family. But, how can we achieve that?

When you go home, every day you fight with your wife.

She asks: “Why are you so late?”

You say: “Why are you asking me? You always ask me! Don’t you know there is traffic? Look outside the window!”

This happens every single day. Then, you get so angry that when you look at the child, you are like:

“Why are you playing with the toy? Why do you look happy? We don’t have happiness here. Where is your homework?”

Child says: “I didn’t get any homework…”

“Why not? I am going to complain to your school!”

God, this is not Qurrata Aaiyyun. There are people, who come to the Masjid for Salah, which is supposed to give you peace, make you calm and settle you down. Then, they go home, and there is a tornado that walked into the house. Children hide under the bed, and the wife gets off the phone. You cannot be the reason for your family to be afraid of you!

You should be a reason for your family to be joyful, overjoyed. Children should love you, they should run to you, and hug you when you come home – that is the relationship you should have with your children.

And, while I am on this topic, twenty, thirty and forty years ago, parenting was different – now, it’s not the same. For fathers- you cannot afford to be authorities over your children, you can no longer afford that. You have to be friends and authorities with your children. Our fathers were not friends with us, they were authorities. We didn’t like nudge our dad on the back and say: “Hey dad, let’s go play some basketball; let’s go play some football!” We didn’t do that.

When Abu (Baba, or Aba Jan) came home, we sat straight and said: “Assalamu Alaikum!” You get their shoes. That was twenty or thirty years ago, but nowadays, your kids don’t do that. And they won’t! We are living in 2016, brothers and sisters! We have to accept the reality that our children are exposed to a lot of things- no matter if you are in the Muslim world, or anywhere else.

“Ahtaraam” (respect) will remain. You have to respect your parents. However, we, as parents are the only ones, who can give to our children the love of Islam. And, you will not be able to give it to them, if you are only in authority, if you only yell at them and tell them what to do- without being their friend. Every father here should know, and master the video games their children play. First of all, it’s a problem, if you let them play video games; however, if you are letting them play, and  are not stopping them- then you better be sitting there, and playing with them. Don’t watch the news – you are not going to change the world! Believe me – you have watched enough news, and nothing has changed. Listen to it in the car, don’t come home and watch TV, don’t come home and watch the news – come home and play with your kids, do homework with your kids, talk to your kids, take your kids to the Masjid-  do that with them and make your kids love you. If we, fathers, don’t do this, we will lose our next generation – I am guaranteeing you.

Our Families; Coolness of our Eyes

7 coolness of eyes

This Dua is at the conclusion of the 25th Surah of the Quran, where Allah (swt) tells us to say:

“And those who say: Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders for the Muttaqun.’” (Al-Furqan 25:74)

“Our Lord”

Those who say: “Our Master, our Lord, gift us, grant us…” We are asking Him to give us a grand, unexpected, and beautiful gift. This prepositional phrase is brought earlier, especially for us. We are asking for a special favour from Allah (swt). What is this favour?

“Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring…”

In other words, you are not asking for children only; you are requesting for your lineage, for your future generations, to be the coolness of your eyes. Make our eyes cool by means of our spouses and by means of our children.

Benefits of this Dua

I call it my favourite Dua for two reasons. One, I am married and I do have children and a spouse. Two, all of us have to appreciate the power of this Dua because of the crisis of the world today. The world’s fundamental institution of family is under attack.

Almost nobody is immune from this problem. In many of our homes, there is a storm. When you find coolness of the eyes, you find refuge from the storm. This storm is not “outside” the house; it is actually “inside” the house! The family has become a place of sorrow, of depression, of sadness, of anger, and of rage. You tend to get away from home to get away from the yelling, the screaming, the name-calling, the insults, the depression, the sadness, and the friction between husband and wife, and between parents and children.

Since there is a crisis inside the home, what better Dua to ask Allah (swt)? Here, Allah (swt) tells us to ask so perfectly, so eloquently that the home should become the place of refuge. Your refuge… your safe haven… should be your spouse and your children and that is inside your home. When you see them, your worries should disappear. But for most of us that’s when our worries begin! It’s the exact opposite.

I want to give you a further appreciation of this remarkably beautiful phrase and how it is used in the Quran. I want to explain this feeling to you that Allah (swt) wants us to have with our families.

Do you know the most strongest of all emotions that exists in the humankind? The strongest emotion that I can think of is the emotion a mother feels for her child. It is the strongest bond. Can you imagine the state of Moosa’s (as) mother’s heart? She puts her baby in the water. You can’t even leave your child outside the hall. You start calling your husband: “Where is he?” “Have you seen him?” You just can’t stop. You are 30 minutes late picking your child up from school. What happens to you, you know. (I know, because I have been late picking up my kids from school before. So I know what my wife goes through.)

Now can you imagine the feelings of Moosa’s (as) mother; she had put her child in what for her was apparently certain death because what was behind was even more graphic. So she was in this desperate situation. Did she know what would happen to the child? She did not. Can you imagine not knowing what is happening or going to happen to your child when you know that they are in a dangerous situation? Subhan’Allah!

On the other hand, there was another woman in the same story. She was married to the Firawn (Pharaoh). You know some times women are in a difficult domestic situation. Now in the case of the Pharaoh’s wife, we don’t know if there was any physical abuse, but the Quran certainly indicates psychological abuse. So much so, that she had to ask for rescue. She had nowhere to turn. So the only place she could turn to was Allah (swt)!

When that baby washed up you know what she said? Now think about this… She picked up the child and she said…

  • “He will be the coolness of my eyes for me.” (read Surah Al-Qasas)
  • “He will be my refuge from the storm.”
  • “He will be my only source of joy because… I am in the middle of sadness.”

She was with the child… that childless woman was with a child now. All of a sudden, all her problems disappeared. That was her first reaction to the child. Subhan’Allah! On a separate note she said to the Pharaoh, “I won’t discuss with you.” She separated herself from the Firawn even in that. Further she said: “He will be the coolness of my eye for me and even for you.”

Even to the Firawn, she didn’t say “for us” because she did not associate herself with him. Subhan’Allah! May Allah be pleased with her!

Now, one last thing about this coolness of the eyes… and why this Dua is so beautiful, powerful, and eloquent.

When a mother has lost her child, which in this case she had, and she is re-united with her child, can you imagine the feeling of that mother? Can you imagine the tears of happiness? Can you imagine that emotion?

Now understand how Allah (swt) describes that emotion. Allah (swt) tells his favour to Moosa (as). He says: “So We restored you to your mother, that she might cool her eyes and she should not grieve.” (Ta-Ha 20:40) Allah (swt) is describing the most amazing joy! The most amazing relief! The most indescribable feeling in the heart of a mother! And what expression does He use? The coolness of the eyes!

And so we ask Allah (swt): “Give us from our spouses and our children…coolness of eyes.” When somebody says, “I want to get married,” he should go further than just wanting to get married. Say: “I want to get married to a spouse who will cool my eyes. I will be the coolness of their eyes and they will be the coolness of mine.”

Allah (swt) took the Dua further and then we understand why he talked about future generations. I’ll conclude with this: “And make us leaders over those who are cautious, conscious, fearful, pious, righteous, and those who are fearful before Allah (swt).”

This makes you realize your relationships right now are not just about you. You are setting a precedent in your family for generations to come. So when you are not acting as good husbands, good wives, good parents, and good children, then what are your future generations going to be doing? Who is going to be answerable for that negative trend that was started by you?

It’s an intelligent Dua that we should find coolness of the eyes not only in our immediate family, but the future generations should be amongst the righteous too. When we are raised on Judgement Day, we will be the Imam (leader) over the entire family, whether they were messed up or not. So we better ask for such kind of people in our lineage who elevate our ranks and not drag us down on the Judgement Day. We beg Allah (swt) that He gives all of us those kinds of families. This Dua is something you and I …everyone… every Muslim… even non-Muslims need today. Make this sincere Dua to Allah (swt) as mentioned in the Quran:

“…Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and make us leaders for the Muttaqun.” (Al-Furqan 25:74)

Original transcription courtesy www.nakcollection.com; edited by hiba’s team with permission.

Coolness of the Eyes – What Does it Mean?

cool-water-wallpaperThere’s a powerful expression in the Quran. It’s captured in two words. Those two words are “Qurrata A’yun” meaning “Coolness of the eyes.” It is mentioned in a number of occasions and it is also found in ahadeeth of the Messenger (sa).

Before I tell you how it is used in the sacred text, I want to tell you how the ancient Arabs used this figure of speech. We can’t really understand it literally as it means something beyond that.

the Arabs had two figures of speech. One is the “eyes becoming cool” and the other is “eyes becoming warm.”

The first thing I would like you to know is that the Arabs had two figures of speech. One is the “eyes becoming cool” and the other is “eyes becoming warm.” When somebody is shedding tears of sorrow, he is suffering from the worst kind of fate. He is in deep depression, sadness and calamity. If an Arab would look at him, he would say that his eyes have become warm.

One of the worst curses in the ancient Arabic language was: “May Allah make his eyes warm,” which means may he suffer the worst kinds of sorrows in his life.

The exact opposite of this expression is what? The eyes becoming cool. For your sorrows… for your sadness… for your pains to be removed completely and for you to feel peace, tranquillity and joy like nothing else.

I’ll give you a simple example of coolness and warmth of the eyes. Imagine you’re at the airport and there are two pairs – each of a mother and son. One mother is saying farewell to her son as he is flying off somewhere. And the other mother is greeting her son who flew in from somewhere. Both the mothers are crying. But for one the eyes are cool. And for the other the eyes are warm. One is shedding tears of joy as she sees her son after many years; her eyes are becoming cool. But the other is letting go of her son. This is what? The eyes becoming warm. I hope you understand the difference.

A few pieces of context before I go further.

A poet, who was also an assassin in Arabia, said that the eyes of my tribe will remain warm. He was waiting on a sand dune, waiting to kill the tribe leader that had offended his tribe. He made poetry in the meantime (I guess he had got a lot of time). Anyway, he said: “My tribe’s eyes will remain warm…until my dagger isn’t warm with his blood.” In other words, when I kill this guy, only then my tribe’s eyes will become cool. The rage, the frustration, and the humiliation that they felt would only disappear upon this guy’s death. “That’s what I’m here to do, to cool the eyes of my tribe.” So it was a means of relieving frustration, anger and ill-feelings. This is the context in which it is used.

in literature we find the precedent of the “eyes becoming cool” equated with “finding refuge from a storm.”

I want to share a final yet beautiful context in Arabic literature where this expression is found. The Arabs used to travel in the desert and there they would experience sandstorms. And in a sandstorm, the Arab used to wrap his face up because obviously your face is being pounded with sand. That Arab was riding on a camel. Subhan’Allah, Allah (swt) has created the camel in a magnificent fashion. The eyelids of the camel actually trap sand and drop them. It doesn’t even have to blink. It’s got a screen in front of his eyes that captures sand and drops it. We don’t have that ‘screen system’ in our eyes. But the camel does. Now the rider couldn’t afford to cover his eyes… could he? Because if he covered his eyes, he wouldn’t know where he was going! He had to keep his eyes exposed and so finally he found a cave; he found some refuge and he said interestingly, “My eyes have finally become cool.”

In other words, in literature we find the precedent of the “eyes becoming cool” equated with “finding refuge from a storm.”

Original transcription courtesy www.nakcollection.com; edited by hiba’s team with permission.