Make a wish list!

wish-listHandling kids in this technology era is not a piece of cake. We have to look after their needs and wants according to what the society has got for them. Also, greatest level of patience is required when we are opposing our children for something which is, undoubtedly, for their own betterment. Furthermore, we have to tell our children the advantages and disadvantages of technology- as one cannot escape the fact and figures around.

They come up with new ideas every day. Undoubtedly, the kids of this era are way more sagacious than we used to be at their age. Once, they start their nursery, they become more
brave and clever. These beauties with brains decide their dress codes and what they want for snack at school.

Just a few days back my son was telling me that he wants a black swimsuit like his friend and also a red water bottle. We must always listen to their demands and queries, but fulfilling each one of it is not a good idea.

Being parents, we must be careful about upbringing these precious pearls, so that they can become coolness of our eyes Insha’Allah. They should have the fear of Allah (swt) first and also the fear of parents. We should mould them in such a way that they should never hesitate in talking about their demands to us, and also ask Almighty Allah (swt) for help always. If they insist on taking a new model of x-box or a play station series or a pink laptop- don’t just hesitate or neglect their demands- rather, tell them that they have to pray to the Almighty Allah (swt) first who is seventy times more than a mother, and He knows what is best for us.

1. Ask for Allah’s (swt) help
Children should be aware of the fact that Allah (swt) is the Creator. He has created everything. All matters lie under His custody and He has the highest position. Moreover, He has absolute rights to distribute His wealth. We should always ask the Almighty for our needs and desires first
because nothing happens without His will. In the light of Ahadeeth, we can share this example that even when the shoe sole breaks, we have to ask Allah (swt) for help.
Besides this, we should also make it clear that whatever Allah (swt) decides for us is the best, and that we should not argue about it.

Parents can also tell them the Hadeeth about Dua which says that if a Dua is not fulfilled in the Dunya, Allah (swt) has got even better for you because He is Ar-Rahman.

2. Teach them right and wrong
Don’t let the children judge that you cannot fulfil their demands just because you cannot for some reasons; instead make the advantages or disadvantages clear about your decision. Tell them about the negativities about it, and that everything is good at a certain age. Also, don’t make promises; just tell them that as soon as they find it appropriate, and when the time will be right- you will try your level best to earn it.

3. Restrict their never ending list
Showering kids with lots of toys and getting all their demands fulfilled will not improve their character, rather weaken it. We should skip unnecessary demands of our children.

4. Take a look at the poor class
Very calmly just explain to your kids that a few people are even starving for the basic amenities of life. And Allah (swt) the Almighty has blessed us with a luxurious lifestyle. We should save a little bit of our pocket money to help the needy households. We can fix a specific amount to give every month which will ultimately reward us in the hereafter. This can only be done when we cut down our unnecessary expenses.

5. Count on your blessings
Allah (swt), the Almighty, has blessed us with health, wealth, family, education and so on. We ought to thank Allah (swt) for every breath we take. Hence, only listing down the things we are granted with will make us feel more thankful to our Lord.

Inculcating these habits in children will make them content in their lives; and hence, make them responsible individuals. Insha’Allah.

Ask the One Who gives everyone

A young lady named Umme-Jaffar was very kind and helpful. She used to give people money with her right hand so that the left hand would not know. For some days, she took the same path. On the way, she used to see two blind men sitting on the road. Both of them used to call out for money. One man used to call out: “O Allah (swt), you are the duamost merciful, please provide me with my livelihood.”

The second blind man said: “O Allah (swt), give me Umme – Jaffar’s left over. Umme-Jaffar listened to whatever the two blind men said. She gave both of them something. The one who was asking from Allah (swt), she gave him two Darham; and the one who was asking for Umme-Jaffar’s leftover, she gave him steamed chicken. The interesting point is that the one, who got chicken, used to sell his chicken to the second blind man in two Darhams. This unusual act went on for a few days.  Then one day, Umme – Jaffar  went to one blind man who asked for Umme – Jaffar’s left over and inquired: ”Did you get a hundred Dinars?”

The blind man got scandalized, and said: ”No. I used to get one steamed chicken which I used to sell over in two Darhams.”

Umme-Jaffar said: ”The one who asks from Allah (swt), I used to give him two Darhams. And I used to give you one steamed chicken in which every day I used to put ten Dinars.”

The blind man started hitting his cranium on the enclosure. He started clamouring badly, and he said: ”O my misfortune. Why did I do that? Oh I got smitten.”

Umme – Jaffar said: ”Hopefully, the one who asked Allah (swt) has achieved whatever he needed. And the one who used to ask people is bereft from everything.”

“Undoubted! The one, who asks from people, gets nothing; and in future, they get ignominy as luck.”

People should ask from Allah (swt) because nowadays people sell their Iman for Dinars and Dirhams.”