Post-Ramadan Resolutions to Make This Year


  • Put on the weight of good deeds: Most resolutions people make tend to revolve around weight. Let yours, too! Vow to put on the weight of good deeds. Continue with the extra Ibadah you have become accustomed to this Ramadan, and be heavier when you greet the new Ramadan next year!
  • Keep the secret bond: For the past few weeks, you have woken up before dawn to eat Suhoor. Do not let go of this habit. Continue to wake up before the Adhan of Fajr for this is the time Allah (swt) calls out to His slaves, ready to give them whatever they ask Him. Resolve to not let go of this special bond you have created with Him this month.

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Living as a Nuclear Family: Not Always a Rosy Picture


“I have reached the end of my patience. My in-laws know that I now want to live separately. However, my husband cannot afford the rent of accommodation near his parents’ home, and he doesn’t want to move far from them.”

It is natural for a married couple to desire the autonomy and privacy afforded by living as a nuclear family, which is not always there when they share accommodation with extended family members.

Living in what is known as a “joint family” setup involves considerable compromise of a married couple’s independence, privacy, and living space. They often need to live in a single room with their small children for years.

Living in a joint family more often than not totally kills the spontaneity in a married couple’s sexual relationship because they cannot be intimate anywhere besides their bedroom, or at any time of the day besides night time, and that too only when their children have fallen asleep. Many a time, I listen to sisters living in joint families express their justified desire to move out into a separate home for this very reason.

However, what they do not always realize because of their lack of experience in living independently is that living as a nuclear family is not always the rosy picture that it seems to be.

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Mom’s Little Helper


By Syeda Khunsa Batool – Freelance writer and a student of journalism

When I moved to America fifteen years ago with my husband and our five-year-old son, I had no idea about how we would handle our lives. Our plan was quite simple: to educate Ali in the best way possible. He was everything to us. We spent all our efforts on making his life better. I was a little worried about how we would impart Islamic teachings to him, but then my husband told me it was not something to worry about. We would teach him whatever we could, and everything would fall in place with the passage of time. And to be honest, we did not really care; what difference would it make anyway? Well, it did make a difference, proving us wrong.

We were having a pretty normal life. I used to send Ali to school, and my husband spent most of his time at work. After school, I would let Ali go to the park with his friends, and I would mostly go to a friend’s house for tea or community service. We had our own space, we lived without interrupting each other’s routines, and I thought that was my best parenting tactic: to let my son grow the way he wanted to. However, after seven years, our lives started to change. Ali befriended all sorts of kids from school. Even though he was social in his circle, he was quiet at home. I ignored it because I thought it was a temporary phase. As long as he was happy, what was the harm in it?

When Ali was twelve, his father died in a car accident on his way home from work.

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